Three Principles Living

Judith A. Sedgeman, EdD

insecure thinking Tag

Right and Wrong: Painful Thoughts

Many of my clients are intensely engaged in a fruitless, frustrating effort to prove others wrong, or to get others to say or do what they expect. They come in angry and resentful because these people are “ruining” their life or “making” them miserable. They hang their happiness on getting what they think they “need” from people they who have “let them down”. “When”, I always ask them, “is the last time you complied with an angry, accusatory person who insisted that you do or say something?” The usual response is, “Huh?”...

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Feeling Our Way through Life

People seek help from counselors when they feel bad. No one has ever come into a session with me to complain about their thinking. They come in to say, “I’m really depressed.” “I’m sad and I can’t seem to get over it.” “I am so anxious that I can’t concentrate.” “I get so angry I feel like hitting my children.” That kind of statement. So, intuitively, we know that bad feelings are a sign that we need help. But we believe the bad feelings are coming from the events, people and...

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War and Peace

It is ultimately a matter of war and peace whether people across the world come to understand the role of their own and others' thinking and fluctuating states of mind. One person at a time, when someone comes to understand how thought works and what is creating their experience of reality, they become increasingly secure. When a person feels secure, not living at the mercy of external factors, life does not look threatening. Secure people remain calm and exercise judgment, and look for insight and wisdom, rather than reacting or over-reacting...

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Common Sense or Fear? Our choice.

Every time we get new information, we have a choice what to make of it. That choice has nothing to do with the information. It has to do with whether we understand how we bring our own thinking to life as reality. We don't choose the first thought that comes to mind. But every subsequent related thought and what we make of it is strictly up to us. The more deeply we understand our own spiritual nature, that we are generating our life experience by bringing thoughts to mind and then taking them more...

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No need to fix everything!

Lately I've talked with several clients who are sure that "fixing" something in their circumstances will bring them happiness. One is determined to find a job in a bigger city, where she thinks it will be "more fun" to live. One is trying to find a new set of room-mates and a new apartment because she thinks she needs to be with people who are nicer to her to be comfortable at home. Another is worried about the danger of living within 100 miles of a major US military installation and wants to move...

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“What’s wrong with me?”

Since I have begun seeing clients one-on-one as a Mental Health Mentor, the most frequent questions they ask in the first session are: "What's wrong with me? How did  this happen? Why can't  anyone explain to me what happened to my mind?" For the most part, they've had a lot of therapy. And they've been given diagnoses. But  diagnoses do not explain. Diagnoses describe and label symptom sets. What's eating at people are the WHY? questions. Why can't I just be OK again? How did I go wrong? How do people get chemical...

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